I put on the Little Black Dress last night. Was it the night before?
Either way, can I just say WOWWIE!
Look out world! If I would ever *do something* with myself, I'd be a gaddamned KNOCK OUT! I have some fantastic curves if I do say so myself! WOW. I'm blown away. I almost HAVE to find somewhere to wear it now. Anyone who knows me and sees me in it will most certainly fall off their chairs. I barely recognized me. I must be stuck inside alot, with lots of little kids who poop and puke on me, rendering what I'm wearing and what I'm doing with my hair completely useless.
But then I saw a picture of myself- not in the dress, just a picture of me when I wasn't looking, and I got sad. I have no control over what my face does. Michelle laughs at me all the time because she says I don't just smile, my face LIGHTS UP SO MUCH that it's TOO MUCH and it's NOT RIGHT and I see what she means. :( How sad. I didn't even want to be one of those people who doesn't smile all the way/open mouthed/whatever because they are so conscience of how they look. But I should be. Chances are high that it doesn't matter, I barely remember my name most days- the idea that I'll remember to reel it in because I look like a freak show when I'm laughing my head off or really happy ..well, it's just not likely to happen. Maybe if I wear my Little Black Dress every day I'll distract everyone from my overly expressive face?
Why hasn't anyone told me? I mean, Michelle tells me all the time, but I just tune out all of her critcisms because she is FULL of them for me.
*sigh*
and spare me- I love you for anything nice you're wanting to say but it's all the "appropriate" thing to say, and it's okay. I'm not fishing for anything, I was just saying. I hate when Michelle is right.
she's wrong.
ReplyDeletenothing personal, i love your sister. but she's wrong about this.
only those who are so lucky to feel and act on such joy understand.
do NOT eat this.
i can count very few people whose perfect giddiness and happiness and joy pour out of them and it's wonderful to see.
Um, I have told you something similar to what Michelle tells you - your face does light up it has some sort of magic to it - but I don't think it is too much. In fact, I am jealous because you have this incredible ability to "light up". :)
ReplyDeleteHave you ever seen your "O" face? I bet it is worse then your super grin! If you have the ability to enjoy without abandon, without care of what silly thing your face contorts too then no matter how silly you THINK you look you are fucking beautiful.
ReplyDelete~Angie~
Oh, hell, Ang. Last night I did stop to wonder exactly what my face was doing. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!! Have YOU ever seen your O face?????
ReplyDeleteI will NEVER look at my O face. DAMNITT! NO MIRRORS IN MY ROOM! Actually in me and Eddie's first house our bedroom had a whole wall of mirrors. Of course that was pre babies and skinny hot bodies. It was still NOT a sight to behold. I give porn stars A LOT more credit now. lol
ReplyDeleteNO! Porn stars are bad! Bad! Bad! Unless of course it's porn with REAL women in it. Give me someone who's shoved a few babies out of her vagina after growing them, and then been a little too busy taking care of them to care what her abs or ass or the backs of her legs look like! BOOOOO HISSSSSSS on barbie perfect girls!
ReplyDeleteI didn't know I really cared. hahahah!
And for all I know "real women" porn is out there. I'm a porn bore.