Do you know what breaks my heart? Other than the disgusting news that had me crying within 5 minutes of watching it, I mean? It breaks my heart when people I love cannot see their potential, or are too scared to go for it.
So I'm here to cheerlead today. I don't know quite how it is that I can so clearly see how you will not fail if you go for that thing that you really, really want to do. Look it it- for years now you've had this dream, the same dream. It's trying to reach you, but you gotta do your part to get it here. Did you know that you CANNOT FAIL??? I realize that that all depends on your own definition of the word fail- but you can't. The system isn't set up that way. Stop and look around you- YOU ALONE (well, along with the other people involved in your dream, living their dreams) made these things happen. YOU made your house your house, your home. YOU currently are making money doing whatever you are doing right now, and at one point, that was your dream. You think something up, and then you make it happen. You're magic! In fact, this works even better if you're agnostic because too many people who believe in God then live reacting to thing "Well, God wanted it this way" instead of creating. But no, everything is in your own hands if you don't have a Goddess throwing different life situations at you (and I don't believe this is how that goes, either, for the record). YOU. It starts and ends with you and you owe it to yourself and the world around you to make this thing happen. We're all waiting and watching. Show us how to make a dream come true.
If you are a God person-- then consider that little nagging voice inside of your body, the one that spurs you along and gets you all excited when you take a step in the direction of your dream, God. And She's telling you that you are worth every single second you spend on making it come true. I know you've taken steps already toward it, and that feeling of exhiliration? It's meant to keep you going. The more you do, the more of that feeling you are going to have. You've done awesome, and you've GOT THIS INSIDE OF YOU.
But I can see you're still scared, otherwise you would have been dream chasing much faster and harder by now.
So we'll take baby steps. And I'm with you. I would never be such an asshole that I'd sit here directing- BEGGING YOU to bust a move, and not walk the walk with you. Sheesh, who do you think I am? Although I hope it hasn't gone un noticed by you that I'm getting really good at doing it. You don't think that having 3 surgeries in a year had no affect on my family or friends, do you? They are the ones who saw me in some big time pain, heard me crying some In Pain tears, saw me get frustrated that I wasn't healing "faster" (hello, who the hell is back to work in 2 weeks after a major surgery- TWICE? ME!! I ROCK!!!)--- and know that I'd do it again in a minute if I could because it was worth it times a trillion? I have 4 children. I QUIT my job because I was MISERABLE and it occurred to me that it wasn't worth it, that I am worth way more than that, and that I never ever want to look back and wonder what took me so long. That isn't for me, and it isn't for you, either. And do you know what? You already know this.
So- our baby steps. Can you do this with me? For one little week, can you commit to doing one thing each day towards your dream? I don't care how small of a thing it is, but can you do one thing? Every day? Just for this week? Fill out your resume, or make up a mock business proposal that you'd bring to a bank, or look for space for your store, or write for a half hour every night. SOMETHING. Please? Sometimes it might- maybe, maybe not- feel exhausting to do it. I know about this, too. Sometimes it feels like "what for? I have to stay here, doing this, until ___________________" But it has never, ever failed to lift me up, to do something. Anything. Hell, looking at houses gets me all worked up, even if I know I'm not moving. I saw an RV- a pimped out RV with 4 bump outs no less! In the Walmart parking lot. If I'd seen anyone in it, I swear to you I would have gone over and talked to them about their RV.
My current dream, I'm sure you remember, is that I am going to get paid to write. I'm going to get paid enough to make it okay to take off in said RV that I will purchase, for a month or so at a time. The ultimate goal is to take off for one full year. This is no little dream, is it? This dream is going to take some money and some planning, and me writing and selling a story. I've got lots of them in me. So don't think I'm just talking outta my butt. I've got FOUR children who will be affected. However, we include them in our plans and take their input in- agree or disagree, that's how we roll. They clearly aren't old enough (CJ might be?) to understand the full impact of some of these decisions, but they're concerns are heard and that counts. Plus, Momma still knows best, and this world will be a better teacher for them than anyone else could be. I know I already told you this too, but my dream will come at my own comfort's expense. I will be the one who has the hardest time when it actually happens. I may learn more than anyone else does, about me, and the world around me.
I can't wait.
So- are you in? Do I need to cheerlead you more? What I see burning inside of you is so bright, and so beautiful, and I'm not saying that everything would go perfectly on the first attempt, but you don't look at all the people you dated before you got married and think of them as "failures", do you? You did get something from them, and you added something to them also. Please don't be afraid. This is your story, and it's so worth telling. Make it happen. Let's do this! You are going to find people surrounding you who know things about your dream, who can give you information, who will help guide you and direct you to others who know even more. You will find people who cheerlead you in real life, who are waiting to hear what you say, sing, think. Put your heart into action- it's BEAUTIFUL.
The End.
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