Cullen has today off of work, because he has to work Saturday. I was excited about that, wasn't that silly? I will admit, first of all, that some of the things that have "gone back to normal" are good. This is probably good too. Because for a little while there, everything revolved around the kids and I. He seemed really scared that if he didn't spend every waking second with us that I would leave him. So- I was excited he'd had a day off. For some reason I thought that meant family time. And NO, DFF, I did NOT think that it meant he'd help me with the babies. He has tried unsuccessfully a few times to get me to go nap or work out when he's here, and it doesn't feel right to me. They are my wittle babies to watch over. So bite me. But to hang out with us? Sure. The kids don't see him nearly as much and suddenly he's got a million projects going on- getting the hot tub up and running so we can sell it, visiting his mom, going to Farmington to visit his teachers, and don't forget the every important running and working out. There's no room for me anywhere in there. *sigh* It's okay, and we all know that I'm a spoiled fucking brat and that lunch will just show up and it will be just what I wanted and he'll take Jordan with him out, and I will have to take back this whole wahhhhhh later.
By the way, back to me wanting to leave him. Or HIM thinking I wanted to leave him. You probably don't remember the day but he point blank asked me and I hesistated. That is still what eats him up. I wish I could make him understand that he was GONE for TWO YEARS. We got his leftovers on SUNDAY. That was it, and there was stuff to do on Sundays. TWO YEARS. My hesitation was more about how I had to function as a single mom in day to day life, so when he was around, he was one more person to look out for. "Shhh, dad's sleeping. Go downstairs, dad's sleeping. No, dad's running right now..." and that if I were a real single mom, I could do exactly as I wished. I could take off with the kids and hit the road. I could do anything and not have to take another human's wants and needs into consideration.
But then he decided to get another job like RIGHT THEN almost. So maybe he does get it somewhat.
Yesterday he did come to CJ's practice after "working" even though I was there, meaning he could go home. But it was nice out so he brought Jordan and Josh and the kids played. I made a new friend named Julie. She homeschools her 6th grader. ! !!! She said she just wants to homeschool her through middle school, but I think she'll get to highschool age and remember how shitty that is for kids to, in general. I think hers is a more religious based curriculum than I'll use but Nice! A new friend!
That was an easy $50 a Target, too, the market research thing. I wonder if he hates his job. He's just a young guy, married with a 2 year old boy, lives in Eagan. His social security number is 475...I'm JUST KIDDING!
I would never post his social. ;)
The very last question about kids makeup was "Do you feel that this is a needed item?"
Of course it isn't. But we have girl babies, and they copy their mommas. If you know me, you know I barely wear makeup, and yet Julia loves it. *sigh* I have to pick my battles. Today I pick getting rid of more stuff. Or cleaning Jordan's room so we can paint it.
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